A Time for Potions Part II

It was a dark and lonely night full of despair and teenage angst. All Spaden wanted to know was if he was the one who would marry Delaney. He was a twin, born with a conception betrothal that was having a hard time figuring out which twin was supposed to marry her.

If a spell could show him his true love, his forever, then he wouldn’t have doubts anymore. The longing for the Prince of Nivern? Dead. The competition with Spence? Also gone. They’d know.

He’d made the spell, unfortunately he’d made it about showing him his true love. The problem with Wiccan spells was their specificity. Especially with intention magic.

That’s how Spaden found himself dead.

At first he’d suspected the chest pain was anxiety, or maybe indigestion, or heartburn. He was probably too young for heartburn, but weirder things had happened.

He should have been more specific. He should have considered his true love was dead, and then added a clause ike show me my true love in a dream, or show me my true love in a picture, or show me my true love if they’re alive. Except, being specific like that with plants was tricky. He’d have to include something for vision, maybe something for dreams…

It was too late, anyway. Spaden was dead, and his true love with Niels Poulsen. He was standing there, at a Death-replica of his family’s Danish estate pruning trees. Niels was the god of death, so he was there often. But pruning trees? Is that how gods of Death spent their time?

Life is so horrible, guess I’ll go cut some imaginary branches off of imaginary trees in the underworld.

That was his true love: god of Death, married to the king, raging asshole, famous rockstar, Niels.

Spaden got out of there as fast as he could, running at full speed through other people’s Deathscapes until he slammed into Mallory or Sawyer.

What were they doing here? Had Spaden specified dream? This could be a dream. Most people didn’t have spontaneous post-dinner family reunions with most of their siblings in Death.

Even weird fantasy people.

“Hey,” Spaden said, trying to sound normal. Did his dream siblings care? 

“Why did you die?” Mallory narrowed her eyes. “You don’t even wear makeup.”

“Makeup?” Spaden looked between them. “Did makeup kill you?”

Sawyer looked away and started whistling. A herd of death frogs swarmed around him in a ribbitty mass, the perfect avoidance tactic to confirm what Spaden now suspected: Death by makeup.

Mallory glared at Sawyer. She turned back towards Spaden so fast her hair whipped around. “Yes. I mean. I was just. I don’t normally wear it, okay?”

Spaden laughed. “You have a ton of makeup in your nightstand. In that secret compartment.”

“Why do you guys never stay out of my stuff!”

“No, I just dusted the drawer handle to see who touched it!” Sawyer said, incriminating himself.

“Right. So, you made the makeup.” Sawyer’s affinity was poison. Sure, he said it was frogs. But what did his frogs generally have in common? Poison. What did Sawyer do to Mallory’s makeup?

Poison.

If he made the spell, then it was going to be a pain to revive them. His parents would either never find them or they’d be up all night trying to figure it out. His dad was great at medical magic and revivals, but he was not skilled at the fine art of undoing Sawyer’s madness. That was like asking the person who calculated the velocity and composition of an asteroid through space to dissect how a chess master lost a game.

“I’m going to find Niels,” Spaden concluded aloud.

He spun around and took a long breath. Finding Niels meant facing the knowledge that Niels was his person. It meant facing a future without his soul mate. Would second best be ok? People survived that sort of heartbreak all the time, but Spaden had never expected himself to be the person suffering.

“Yeah?” Mallory said.

Spaden was hesitating. He had to pull it together before they noticed. “I think I found him, the vibe of him. He’s here in Death, so we should go together to him. No one gets lost or left behind.”

“What d’you want Niels for?” Sawyer asked. He picked up one of his new frog minions and pet it like a cat.

A small blush crept up Spaden’s cheeks. “He can bring us back.”

“Why? You like school that much?”

“I like living that much,” Spaden defended.

“This is like living, but better! You get endless reams of whatever you want. And mom’s not here to steal your soda.”

With the flash of a thought, Sawyer made it rain grape soda. It poured from the sky like glistening purple tears of sugar. The frogs rejoiced, Mallory glowered, and Spaden snuck a taste before he pivoted techniques.

Sawyer was playing chess. With his spells, with his life…

“Ok, we stay,” Spaden said. “But you’ll never marry Nim with a mentality like that.”

Sawyer lifted his chin definitely, plowing through so Spaden couldn’t even tell if Sawyer cared. “It’s a vacation, not a permanentation.”

“Unless it becomes a permanentation. If Dad gives up? We’re screwed.”

“Or someone steals our souls. That would be even worse.”

Sawyer exhaled like a horse while shoving frogs in his pockets. “If you insist on being lame, I guess we can go find Niels.”

“I insist on being lame.” Spaden put a hand on Mallory and the other on Sawyer before they could change their mind (or Sawyer could load his pants with more frogs). He imagined Niels, the way he’d seen him pruning the trees in his fitted pants. In an instant they were there.

Except, this time Spaden had arrived right in front of him instead of conveniently behind one of the trees, somewhat hidden and discreet.

“Don’t get an older bro-” Sawyer started, but then his jaw dropped.

Spaden didn’t follow his eyes. It was humiliating enough.

“Hello,” the silky smooth voice of Niels rang out. Why hadn’t Spaden ever noticed how nice it sounded before? The lit of his Danish accent, the way his lips parted subtly.

And Spaden was staring. This was worse than a horror movie. 

“Can I help you?” Niels asked.

“Yeah,” Spaden said, melting inside. “We need you to bring us back? We died. We don’t want to be dead.”

“He doesn’t want to be dead,” Sawyer corrected. “I don’t have a problem with it.”

“Yeah.” Spaden couldn’t stop staring. What was wrong with him? He’d never had a problem with staring at Niels before. Had one spell changed everything? It mustbe a cognitive bias. If he could only convince himself of the bias, so he could look at Niels like he was a rich rockstar again. “Ah.”

“Oh my god, Spaden!” Mallory groaned.

He swallowed.

“Back where?” Niels asked.

“To our place? In the Dells?”

“Ohhh,” Niels said. “I think if you think about it really hard, you’ll get there. That’s usually how I get home.”

“Can you stop being an asshole for five minutes?” Spaden asked, his heart pounding, his ears ringing.

Niels blinked. “I don’t know what I said that was wrong, so I don’t know how to stop being wrong.”

He was different like this, which was…in Death? Spaden didn’t know why he was so different, but he was.

“Just take our hands and bring us back to life or something,” Spaden said.

“Life? Oh.” His face fell. “You want my brother.”

“Your what-er?”

“Niels. You want Niels.”

He wasn’t Niels? Spaden’s true love wasn’t Niels. It was a clone of Niels, no, a brother of Niels. They looked way too much alike, except for the hair. Now that he thought about it, the clothes were different too, and the hair. Niels wore his drooped over his eyes like he needed curtains to avoid seeing the world, but this guy. What was his name? “Who are you?”

“Oh my god I wish I had a camera,” Mallory beamed. “It’s NERD Niels! I could torment him for life if I had photo evidence.”

Spaden moved to step in front of not-Niels. At the same time the guy shoved his hand forward to introduce himself. Instead, the guy’s finger dug into Spaden’s side. He burst into laughter as his stomach arched away from the guy’s unsuspecting hand. With his brain fully off, Spaden tucked and rolled. Into a tree. His feet sprawled on either side. It looked like he had a giant broccoli erection.

If he wasn’t dead, he would have died right then and there.

“I’m Espen,” Not-Niels said. He kept his laughter barely contained.

Sawyer didn’t. He was laughing so hard his pockets were birthing frogs as they escaped the earthquake. Mallory was laughing too, but she cleared her throat and shook Espen’s shocked hand. “Mallory.”

Upside down, Spaden reached up towards Espen. “Spaden.”

Espen came over and helped him stand. “You’re…probably pretty dead. Unless you happen to know people who revive people.”

“That’s why we were looking for Niels.

“Ohhhh. Yes. That makes sense,” Espen said.

“He’s like my grandpa or something,” Spaden explained, but then he realized that implied he was related to Niels. “Except he’s not. We’re not related. He’s dating someone old that I know that is like…he’s a king, and he’s everyone’s grandpa, in the way that.” Spaden swallowed. “The point being, we’re unrelated, but aware of one another’s existence. He’d probably bring us back.”

Then again, it turned out he hadn’t brought his own brother back to life. What if he said no?

“I know him. The white death,” Espen said.

“Is that what you call him?”

“He has a lot of names. God of Snow. Mr. Cocaine. There’s heaps of other names. The tartars even call him the Bone Powder Death. Talc Death”

Spaden laughed. When the laugh ended, his smile stayed. Nerd Niels was cute. “Does anyone call him something accurate, like…the glowing snow bear?”

“I call him thanks for shutting Niels up before I had to tell him off.”

Spaden laughed again. He was a blubbering idiot on display for his siblings, and he bet they knew what was going on, but he didn’t care. Mallory was all doe-eyed for Seamus, this guy that worked at the Nivernese temple. Sawyer had bonded to one of the princesses—Niels’ daughter, no less—at least a dozen times. Spaden only knew that because he had to make Sawyer’s bond tea every week. If he took any from the family supply, the palace supply, or even asked their dad then he’d have to talk to them about it. So, Spaden made it. 

“If you’re Niels’ brother, maybe we can hang out here until he shows up?” It was a good excuse to get to know him and figure out why Niels never brought him to life. He could explain why he was spending his death trimming tree branches.

“I have a ding-a-ling I can use to call him,” Espen said.

Spaden’s brain went momentarily offline while he tried to process his soulmate across all of Life and Death having a ding-a-ling. Systems had to be rebooted. He failed to respond.

Mallory saved the day. “A ding-a-ling? A ding-a-ling?”

Espen’s cheeks pricked pink with a blush. “A bell. I have a bell. Just in case I’m in trouble. But I’m not really in trouble, you are. I don’t know if he’d be mad if I used it.”

Mallory glanced around him. “Where is it? He can tell me off if he has to.”

“How does he have a bell that rings across the in between?” Sawyer asked, eyes narrowed. “How come I’ve never heard it?”

“The what?” Spaden and Mallory asked together.

“Nothing.” Sawyer picked up a frog. “Just seems weird.”

Spaden didn’t want to know what Sawyer was hiding. Mallory seemed to draw the same conclusion. Espen decided to answer the question literally: “It’s not. It’s like a physical representation of the connection between us. It’s a metaphor for a bell.”

Now Spaden wanted to see it. “I’ll tell Niels it’s our fault. He won’t be mad at you if we do it. Right? He’s sometimes reasonable.”

Espen hesitated. The sound of frogs permeated the air. He looked at Sawyer. Then Mallory. And then he met Spaden’s eyes, and Spaden melted. “Please.”

“And then you’ll go? Because that…that makes sense. To be alive.”

“You’re coming too,” Spaden decided.

Espen stepped back and shook his head. “It’s safer here. And if Niels wanted me alive he would’ve offered.”

“Please?” Spaden pleaded. He couldn’t have a dead soul mate. It wasn’t conducive to his living goals. “I want you alive.”

“You’ll have to ask him,” Espen said.

“Spaden.” Mallory gave him a mom look he didn’t deserve. “You can’t. What if he refuses to bring any of us back because you’re demanding already-dead people?”

He couldn’t tell her why he needed Espen alive, that they were soul mates, that his entire romantic future would be doomed if Espen didn’t come back to life.

“Then he can bring you back and I’ll stay with Espen.”

“Mom would kill you.”

“Why are you staying?” Espen asked. “You have a life. You should use it.”

He had a life, and he’d traded his life to be with Espen. That was the spell, ultimately. No matter the cost, he’d wanted to be with his soulmate. His soulmate was dead, and he might not have a way back to life. If he did…why would Niels keep him dead?

A shiver down Spaden’s spine.

Before he had to answer them, Niels and Meldrick arrived in Death. Smoke spread wildly across the ground from their feet, dissipating. Meldrick tossed his hands around like he could air it out. While he fussed, Niels cracked his knuckles. “What is going on?”

“I brought my brother and sister on vacation and they don’t even appreciate it,” Sawyer complained.

“We tried to appreciate it,” Spaden joked.

“That bell is for you.” Niels glowered at Espen. It was his signature look.

“Yes. I’m in danger of not having enough space in my house for all of these extra people.”

Spaden stood at Espen’s side, shoulders squared, eyes fixed on Meldrick—arguably the more lenient of the two. “He wants to come to life. He wants a life.”

Niels’ gaze shot to Spaden’s. “Does he.”

Was that a question? Spaden tried not to cower, but Niels was all powerful and blue haired. How had Spaden confused the two? They were nothing alike. Even their noses were different: Niels’ was remodeled after a break, Espen’s was still straight. “

“Please?” Spaden begged. “Make our death worth something.”

Meldrick chuckled. “Isn’t you coming back to life the worth something bit?”

“I thought how they died was what made it worth it or not,” Niels argued.

“All adventures need souvenirs for their adventures?” Spaden tried to sound confidence, but he was failing. He would have to tell them why he needed Espen alive, why he deserved to be alive.

Espen set his hand on Spaden’s back. “It’s ok. I’ve had a good…I mean, I’m fine.”

“It’s not ok!” Spaden turned to face Espen, and realized they were too close. He could smell the flowers on Espen’s skin, which was weird because they were dead, but Spaden wasn’t about to argue the semantics about scents. Instead, he wove his fingers with Espen’s and held his hand up so he could see.

Everyone could see.

He didn’t care. “Please come back with me.”

Espen’s eyes were wide. He stared in Spaden’s for a long amount of unmeasured death time, then turned to Niels and Meldrick. “Could…I?”

Niels leaned towards Meldrick and whispered something. They shared some silent comments no one else could hear, and then turned to face Spaden and Espen as a unified front.

They’d decided

“Fine,” Niels groaned. “On one condition.”

“Anything,” Spaden said, and then he remembered his mom teaching him about negotiating when he was little and he’d traded anything for a cookie. Big mistake. She’d made him use a flat dull knife to clean under the floor trim. Sawyer was a toddler back then. There was so much slime, and dirt, and some frog bits that had gotten…Spaden didn’t want to think about what had happened to the frogs, but he recognized the purple and neon blue spots on one that Sawyer held in his hands. “Reasonable. Anything reasonable.”

Niels grinned. “You have to come here one day a month on the full moon and help us ward this place. There’s some bad guys we keep stowed away, but your magic is less inflexible than Spence’s. It would be easier to work with.”

One night of work a month for a lifetime opportunity to try and be with Espen. It wasn’t even guaranteed to work out—soulmates didn’t always end up together.

He’d be like a werewolf, but instead of transforming he’d become employed.

“Ok,” Spaden agreed. “I’ll do it.”

“What’s my price?” Espen asked. “You want me for something.”

“The point is we want Spaden,” Meldrick said. “And now we’ve found a way to make it worthwhile for him.”

“Not you. Him. His price.” He looked at Spaden. “Your price.”

Spaden looked at their hands. Espen dropped his.

This was a disaster. What was he expected? To show up and say you are my true love!

No, he was expected to show up near Bentley or Delaney, bumble around a bit, go home, and process the answer to his question. But, it was neither of them. It was this guy he’d never met before, this guy he’d just agreed to give up every full moon for. It wasn’t a promise of love, it was…it was nothing.

“You have to stay a live for one year, give life a real chance, and…No. Two years. The first year might go badly. And.” Spaden choked on his nerves. “One date a month.”

“Are toilets real?”

“Yes?” Were they a deal breaker?

Espen shuddered. “Two years. Two dates.”

Spaden’s shoulders fell. It was probably unreasonable to ask for twenty-four dates, especially if the first ten went badly. They’d be suffering. It would be hell.

Worse than Death.

“Okay, two dates.”

“You’ll adjust to the toilets,” Meldrick insisted. He wrapped his arm around Espen’s shoulders. “Breathing is also real.”

“Come on,” Niels said, joining Meldrick in leading Espen towards an arbitrary point. “We have kids wreaking havoc in our living room right now.”

“I’ll figure it out,” Espen said, but he sounded anxious.

“I’ll help you, as a friend,” Spaden insisted.

Espen nodded. Mallory joined them near the arbitrary launch-to-live spot. Spaden was about to, but Sawyer was hanging back like he might not come. Spaden went and grabbed his arm and dragged him over. “You don’t get to stay behind,” he insisted.

Sawyer sighed dramatically, but he didn’t run. Niels and Meldrick did their god thing and with another shiver, a lot of nausea, a small amount of vomit in his mouth, and a headache that made the world feel like a house of mirrors was smashed through his skull, they were alive.

“Who are you?”

Sawyer rubbed his head. He was in his body in his dad’s office. The lights were too bright. Espen was standing beside Spaden, towering over him. His parents were towering over them too. 

“Who are you?” his mom asked.

“I’m nobody,” Espen said.

“Ja, and don’t forget it.” Niels walked towards the door.

“He’s new to life,” Meldrick explained to Spaden’s parents. “He’s coming to live with us as a live-in babysitter. We’re drowning in children. I thought the infant stage would be the hardest, but as it goes, toddlers are much more destructive.

“He didn’t bring his own brother out of Death until now,” Mallory tattled. “Disgusting.” She stood up. “And so was that makeup.”

“Heyyyy,” Niels raised an eyebrow, folded his arms, and leaned against the doorframe. “I can’t show favorites any more than your parents can.”

Spaden glanced down. “He brought him back to life for me.”

When he looked up he found his parents both looking at him for more information. Spaden didn’t know what to say. He didn’t want to admit what he’d done, he wasn’t ready. He’d died to find Espen.

“For you?” His mom said.

“How did you die?” his dad asked. “You didn’t touch the makeup.”

“It was a car accident when I was a baby,” Espen said.

There were some chuckles, but mostly his parents were staring at him.

“How did Spaden die,” his dad asked.

Spaden could feel his eyes staring him down. They were so focused on him they didn’t notice Sawyer unloading the frogs from his pockets. He’d somehow brought them back from Death.

No one cared because, even though they’d died, Spaden was the main event of the night.

“I was doing a spell, like Sawyer,” he pointed out.

“What spell?” Mallory asked.

He glared at her. “It’s not important. I won’t do it again.”

“Spaden.” His dad was all bossy, pushy. He’d cave. Spaden knew he’d admit it, but then they’d know.

“Can we talk about it later? In private?” He wasn’t sure he wanted Espen to know yet, not all of the details. He definitely didn’t want his siblings to know about it. Mallory would tease him forever.

“Can we talk about it now?” his mom pushed.

“Ja, I’m dying to know what spell you were doing,” Niels said, still leaned causally against the doorframe.

“Then go die,” Spaden suggested. “No one is stopping you.” He pulled at his collar. It was too hot, too tight. The walls were closing in around him.

“Spaden,” his mom said again. The tone screamed I’ve already counted from ten, now spill.

“A…A true love spell,” Spaden tried to mumble. “To find my person, to see who it’s supposed to be, if it’s supposed to be Delaney.”

Even if it was Delaney, he’d died. The betrothal was broken.

Espen turned a weird color of red, like all the shades between red and purple possible.

His parents shared a look.

“It doesn’t mean we have to be together,” Spaden told Espen. “It means…”

“It means we’re glad Niels brought him back. Thank you, you saved us some frustrating conversations,” his dad said.

Niels shook his head. “Jesus Christ. I should’ve left them all.”

Meldrick was at his side, massaging his back, comforting him. “It’s not like he transported to you, only your stunt double.”

“I’m the stunt double,” Niels said. He tossed his hands up and walked out the door. “He’s the stunted double.”

“Perhaps,” Meldrick said, following him.

“You think I can’t take you?” Espen walked towards them. “I have all kinds of skills you know nothing about.”

“I think we can take you to our apartment. Spaden can come too, but I think it’s best you set up residence with us, not with Spaden, for the time being. Get to know one another, go on those two dates.”

Espen looked at Spaden. “Slow. Careful.”

“Skills,” Niels mocked. “You don’t even know how to flush a toilet.”

“You push the lever fast?”

“This is going to be fun,” Sawyer said, still stroking one of the frogs. He gathered his minions and walked down the hall.

“I think we’re all tired…” Spaden said. He faked a yawn and stretched his arms wide. “I’m headed to bed.”

His parents looked at him. “We’ll talk more tomorrow. To all of you. And no more experiments, Sawyer.”

Spaden watched as everyone went their own ways, but he stood there a moment longer. It was almost a full moon. Something inside him itched. What had he signed up for?